Even though I'm on a self imposed movie ban for a while (I know, I can't believe it either - I just have TOO MUCH STUFF!), I still can't help myself sneakin a peek at what's coming out over the next month or so and maybe even pre-ordering an item ot two...maybe. But considering the paltry offerings that March has on show, my media ban stays in tact, and it's no wonder this update is late. *Yawn*......zzzzz......Huh? Wha?

For some unknown Hollywood asinine reason, the month is filled with unecessary sequels and remakes. Many, many years after the original movie, the powers that be have decided that Bachelor Party needs a direct-to-dvd sequel. Good call! High Five! Yeah, I'm being sarcastic! You can buy that on the 11th, or you can save your money and watch the original! Much better idea! Equally repulsive and just slightly more retarded is the April Fools Day remake, which you can get on the 25th of this month, or you can save your money and watch the original. I'm sensing a pattern here!! On the 11th as well, is the release of Bats: Human Harvest, a sequel to that Bats movie. Once again you can buy it, or save your money. That's it. Just save your money. No need to watch the original, as it sucked balls as well.

The only thing I think is kinda cool this month is the Leprechaun Triple feature on the 11th, where you get your chance to see Jennifer Aniston before she got her nose fixed, and two shitty Leprechaun sequels. I passed - I have the Ferris Bueller TV series for Aniston nose comparisons, and besides, I can't rag on her too much because a) my boyfriend thinks she's hot, and b) she's far more classy than Angelina 1000 kids homewrecker. Hiyyaaaahh!!

Wrestlemaniac, yes thats right, that wrestling horror movie is out on the 11th too. It's been out here for ages, and i wasn't interested then, and it barely made it in to this list this month.

But if you live in Australia like me, not only do you rock, but you also have plenty to empty you wallet for at the latest JB-Hifi. (Shameless plug for my brothers work.) On the 3rd, we get a whole heap of re-releases, including The Dead Zone, Ginger Snaps, Halloween 2 & 3 and Shriek if you know what I did last Friday the 13th at massively budget prices, along with a few we haven't seen before. Candyman 3, The Dentist, Howard the Duck AND Super Mario Brothers. And we all know how John Leguizamo kicks all kinds of ass.

Also on the 3rd is a double pack of American Psycho and American Psycho 2. The first movie is brilliant in a troubling kind of way, but the second is a giant piece of poo. I have reviewed both. Reader discretion is advised for the American Psycho 2 review. Not just because I hated it with a passion, but my writing really sucked back then too.

On the 5th I'm excited to announce the arrival of Repossessed on DVD, but not so excited to tell you of Bloodrayne: Deliverance. Boo. Why can't they make decent video game movies? Why has Uwe Boll set the bar so low??

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